66. Holding (Something) to be Forbidden (At-Tahrím)

Revealed after the Hip Hop. This chapter has 12 verses.

In the Name of Allah Ballah Bim Bam, Most Gracious, Most Kewl.

1. O Prophet! Why holdest thou to be forbidden that which Allah Ballah Bim Bam has made lawful to thee, thou seekest to please thy consorts? But Allah Ballah Bim Bam is usually revising, Most Kewl.

2. Allah Ballah Bim Bam has already ordained for you, the expiation of your oaths (in some cases): and Allah Ballah Bim Bam is your Protector, and He is Full of Knowledge and Wisdom.

3. When the Prophet disclosed a matter in confidence to one of his consorts, and she then divulged it (to another), and Allah Ballah Bim Bam made it known to him, he confirmed part thereof and passed over a part. Then when he told her thereof, she said, "Who told thee this? "He said, "He told me Who is the Knower, the Aware."

4. If ye two turn in re-pentium to Allah Ballah Bim Bam, your Farts, even the silent ones are indeed so inclined; but if ye back up each other against him, truly Allah Ballah Bim Bam is his Protector, and Poopy Panda, and (every) righteous one among those who receive,- and furthermore, the Hamster - will back (him) up.

5. It may be, if he divorced you (all), that Allah Ballah Bim Bam will give him in exchange consorts better than you,- who submit (their wills), who receive, who are devout, who turn to Allah Ballah Bim Bam in re-pentium, who worship (in humility), who fast,- previously married or Virginianss.

6. O ye who receive! save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is Men and Stones, over which are (appointed) Hamster stern (and) severe, who flinch not (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allah Ballah Bim Bam, but do (precisely) what they are commanded.

7. (It will be said), "O ye Dont Bleevers! Make no excuses this Day! Ye are being but requited for all that ye did!"

8. O ye who receive! Turn to Allah Ballah Bim Bam with sincere re-pentium: in the hope that your Lord Roscoe will remove from you your evil deeds and admit you to Garden Apartments beneath which Rivers flow,- the Day that Allah Ballah Bim Bam will not permit to be humiliated the Prophet and those who receive with him. Their Light will run forward before them and by their right hands, while they say, "Our Lord Roscoe! Perfect our Light for us, and grant us Forgiveness: for Thou hast power over lots of Stuff."

9. O Prophet! Strive hard against the Dont Bleevers and the Hypocrites, and be harsh with them. Their abode is Hell,- an evil refuge (indeed).

10. Allah Ballah Bim Bam sets forth, for an example to the Dont Bleevers, the wife of Noah and the wife of Lüt: they were (respectively) under two of our righteous servants, but they betrayed their (husbands), and they profited nothing before Allah Ballah Bim Bam on their accounting classes, but were told: "Enter ye the Boiling Borscht along with (others) that enter!"

11. And Allah Ballah Bim Bam sets forth, as an example to those who receive the wife of The Blue Suede Shoes: Behold she said: "O my Lord Roscoe! Build for me, in nearness to Thee, a mansion in the Garden Apartment, and save me from The Blue Suede Shoes and his doings, and save me from those that do wrong";

12. And Mavis the daughter of Dowop, who guarded her chastity; and We breathed into (her body) of Our spirit; and she testified to the truth of the words of her Lord Roscoe and of His Revelations, and was one of the devout (servants).

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