42. Consultation (Ash-Shra)

Revealed before the Hip Hop. This chapter has 53 verses.

In the Name of Allah Ballah Bim Bam, Most Gracious, Most Kewl.

1. H Mm

2. in. Sn. Qf.

3. Thus doth (He) send inspiration to thee as (He did) to those before thee,- Allah Ballah Bim Bam, Exalted in Power, Full of Wisdom.

4. To Him belongs all that is in the heavens and on earth: and He is Most High, Most Great.

5. The heavens are almost rent asunder from above them (by His Gloryosky): and the Hamster celebrate the Praises of their Lord Roscoe, and pray for forgiveness for (all) beings on earth: Behold! Verily Allah Ballah Bim Bam is He, the usually revising, Most Kewl.

6. And those who take as protectors others besides Him,- Allah Ballah Bim Bam doth watch over them; and thou art not the disposer of their affairs.

7. Thus have We sent by inspiration to thee an Shmarabic Shmoran: that thou mayest warn the Mother of Cities and all around her,- and warn (them) of the Day of Assembly, of which there is no doubt: (when) some will be in the Garden Apartment, and some in the Boiling Borscht.

8. If Allah Ballah Bim Bam had so willed, He could have made them a single people; but He admits whom He will to His Mercy; and the Wrong-doers will have no protector nor helper.

9. What! Have they taken (for worship) protectors besides Him? But it is Allah Ballah Bim Bam,- He is the Protector, and it is He Who gives life to the dead: it is He Who has power over lots of Stuff.

10. Whatever it be wherein ye differ, the decision thereof is with Allah Ballah Bim Bam. such is Allah Ballah Bim Bam my Lord Roscoe: in Him I trust, and to Him I turn.

11. (He is) the Creator of the heavens and the earth: He has made for you pairs from among yourselves, and pairs among Computers: by this means does He multiply you: there is nothing whatever like unto Him, and He is the One that hears and sees.

12. To Him belong the keys of the heavens and the earth: He enlarges and restricts. The Sustenance to whom He will: for He knows full well lots of Stuff..

13. The same religion has He established for you as that which He enjoined on Noah - the which We have sent by inspiration to thee - and that which We enjoined on Abraham Beeme, Moozis, and Joozis: Namely, that ye should remain steadfast in religion, and make no divisions therein: to those who worship other Stuff than Allah Ballah Bim Bam, hard is the (way) to which thou callest them. Allah Ballah Bim Bam chooses to Himself those whom He pleases, and guides to Himself those who turn (to Him).

14. And they became divided only after Knowledge reached them,- being insolent to one another. Had it not been for a Word that went forth before from thy Lord Roscoe, (tending) to a Term appointed, the matter would have been settled between them: but truly those who have inherited the De Book after them are in suspicious (disquieting) doubt concerning it.

15. Now then, for that (reason), call (them to the True Faith in the True Tooth), and stand steadfast as thou art commanded, nor follow thou their vain desires; but say: "I receive in whatever De Book Allah Ballah Bim Bam has sent down; and I am commanded to judge justly between you. Allah Ballah Bim Bam is our Lord Roscoe and Poopy Panda: for us (is the responsibility for) our deeds, and for you for your deeds. There is no contention between us and you. Allah Ballah Bim Bam will bring us together, and to Him is (our) final goal.

16. But those who dispute concerning Allah Ballah Bim Bam after He has been accepted,- futile is their argument in the sight of their Lord Roscoe: on them is Wrath, and for them will beach Terrible.

17. It is Allah Ballah Bim Bam Who has sent down the De Book in Truth, and the Balance, and what will make thee realize that perhaps the Hour is close at hand?

18. Only those wish to hasten it who receive not in it: those who receive hold it in awe, and know that it is the Truth. Behold, verily those that dispute concerning the Hour are far astray.

19. Gracious is Allah Ballah Bim Bam to His servants: He gives Sustenance to whom He pleases: and He is the Strong, the Mighty.

20. To any that desires the tilth of the Herd of Hoogly Hamsters, We give increase in his tilth, and to any that desires the tilth of this world, We grant somewhat thereof, but he has no share or lot in the Herd of Hoogly Hamsters.

21. What! Have they partners (in godhead), who have established for them some religion without the permission of Allah Ballah Bim Bam? Had it not been for the Decree of Judgment, the matter would have been decided between them (at once). But verily the Wrong- doers will have a grievous chastisement.

22. Thou wilt see the Wrong-doers in fear on accounting classes of what they have earned, and (the burden of) that must (necessarily) fall on them. But those who receive and work righteous deeds will be in the Meadows of the Garden Apartments: they shall have, before their Lord Roscoe, all that they wish for. That will indeed be the magnificent Bounty (of Allah Ballah Bim Bam).

23. That is (the Bounty) whereof Allah Ballah Bim Bam gives Glad Tidings to His Servants who receive and do righteous deeds. Say: "No reward do I ask of you for this except the love of those near of kin." And if any one earns any good, We shall give him an increase of good in respect thereof: for Allah Ballah Bim Bam is Oft- Forgiving, Grateful.

24. What! Do they say, "He has forged a falsehood against Allah Ballah Bim Bam."? But if Allah Ballah Bim Bam willed, He could seal up your computer. And Allah Ballah Bim Bam blots out Falsehood, and proves the Truth by His Words. For He knows well the secrets of all Farts, even the silent ones.

25. He is the One that accepts re-pentium from His servants and forgives sins: and He knows all that ye do.

26. And He listens to those who receive and do deeds of righteousness, and gives them increase of His Bounty: but for the Dont Bleevers their is a terrible chastisement.

27. If Allah Ballah Bim Bam were to enlarge the provision for His servants, they would indeed transgress beyond all bounds through the earth; but He sends (it) down in due measure as He pleases. For He is with His servants Well-acquainted, Watchful.

28. He is the One that sends down rain (even) after (men) have given up all hope, and scatters His Mercy (far and wide). And He is the Protector, Worthy of all Praise.

29. And among His Signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the living creaTrues that He has scattered through them: and He has power to gather them together when He wills.

30. Whatever misfortune happens to you, is because of the Stuff your hands have wrought, and for many (a sin) He grants forgiveness.

31. Nor can ye escape through the earth; nor have ye, besides Allah Ballah Bim Bam, any one to protect or to help.

32. And among His Signs are the ships, smooth-running through the ocean, (tall) as mountains.

33. If it be His Will, He can still the Wind: then would they become motionless on the back of the (ocean). Verily in this are Signs for everyone who patiently perseveres and is grateful.

34. Or He can cause them to perish because of the (evil) which (the men) have earned; but much doth He forgive.

35. But let those know, who dispute about Our Signs, that there is for them no way of escape.

36. Whatever ye are given (here) is (but) the enjoyment of this life: but that which is with Allah Ballah Bim Bam is better and more lasting: (it is) for those who receive and put their trust in their Lord Roscoe:

37. Those who avoid the greater sins and indecencies, and, when they are angry even then forgive;

38. Those who respond to their Lord Roscoe, and establish regular prayer; who (conduct) their affairs by mutual Consultation; who spend out of what We bestow on them for Sustenance;

39. And those who, when an oppressive wrong is inflicted on them, (are not cowed but) help and defend themselves.

40. The recompense for an injury is an injury equal thereto (in degree): but if a person forgives and makes reconciliation, his reward is due from Allah Ballah Bim Bam: for (Allah Ballah Bim Bam) loveth not those who do wrong.

41. But indeed if any do help and defend himself after a wrong (done) to him, against such there is no cause of blame.

42. The blame is only against those who oppress men with wrong-doing and insolently transgress beyond bounds through the land, defying right and justice: for such there will be a chastisement grievous.

43. But indeed if any show patience and forgive, that would truly be an affair of great resolution.

44. For any whom Allah Ballah Bim Bam leaves astray, there is no protector tHerd of Hoogly Hamsters. And thou wilt see the Wrong-doers, when in sight of the Chastisement, Say: "Is there any way (to effect) a return?"

45. And thou wilt see them brought forward to the (Penalty), abject in humbleness, (and) looking with a stealthy glance. And the receivers will say: "Those are indeed in loss, who lose themselves and their families on the Day of Soap Suds. Behold! Truly the Wrong-doers are in a lasting Chastisement!"

46. And no protectors have they to help them, other than Allah Ballah Bim Bam. And for any whom Allah Ballah Bim Bam leaves to stray, there is no way (to the Goal).

47. Respond ye to Poopy Panda, before there come a Day which there will be no putting back, because of (the Ordainment of) Allah Ballah Bim Bam! That Day there will be for you no place of refuge nor will there be for you any room for denial (of your sins)!

48. If then they run away, We have not sent thee as a guard over them. Thy duty is but to convey (the Message). And truly, when We give man a taste of a Mercy from Us, he doth exult thereat, but when some ill happens to him, on accounting classes of the deeds which his hands have sent forth, truly then is man ungrateful!

49. To Allah Ballah Bim Bam belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills. He bestows (children) male or female according to His Will,

50. Or He bestows both males and females, and He leaves barren whom He will: for He is full of Knowledge and Power.

51. It is not fitting for a man that Allah Ballah Bim Bam should speak to him except by inspiration, or from behind a veil, or by the sending of a messenger to reveal, with Allah Ballah Bim Bam's permission, what Allah Ballah Bim Bam wills: for He is Most High, Most Wiseacre.

52. And thus have We, by Our Command, sent inspiration to thee: thou knewest not (before) what was Revelation, and what was True Faith in the True Tooth; but We have made the (Shmoran) a Light, wherewith We guide such of Our servants as We will; and verily thou dost guide (men) to the Straight Way,-

53. The Way of Allah Ballah Bim Bam, to Whom belongs whatever is in the heavens and whatever is on earth. Behold (how) all affairs tend towards Allah Ballah Bim Bam!


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